Youve cornered him. They engage in passive-aggressive behavior. You should address any insinuation of self-harm with a professional. How to Be the Center of Attention Without Trying (Simple Ways). There might be affiliate links on some of the pages of this site, which means we could earn a small commission of anything you buy. But Overt narcissism, it's sucks because it's right in your face. They lack the ability to empathize with what you might be feeling, and they want you to focus on them and only them. By saying this, they try to tear you down to make themselves feel better. As a result, things may get heated in an argument. By claiming that you make everything about yourself, they are projecting onto you exactly what they do to you. He planned the trip of your dreams a year ahead of time to use it as control over you. Skewed self-esteem and fragile ego. Narcissists will use many unhealthy manipulation techniques during an argument. Its not just a one-time argument, youre not a good person. The narcissist wants you to feel as though their friends all think youre terrible, and so, you cant feel comfortable around them. believe they are superior to others and entitled to special treatment, however, they feel resentful of others because they always feel as if they are not receiving it (Rose 2002). Make it known that you don't agree with them, but try not to argue. "And nothing will ever change things will just get worse.". Being self-involved. if(typeof ez_ad_units != 'undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[580,400],'innertoxicrelief_com-large-mobile-banner-1','ezslot_5',108,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-innertoxicrelief_com-large-mobile-banner-1-0'); This is another jab at your self-esteem. 6. This is another way the narcissist seeks to, undermine both your self-confidence and your self-esteem. They will speak any language and acquire whatever they desire from you without thinking about how it may affect you. They will say they are going to do things but never end up doing them. Stop projecting your feelings onto me., 13. The narcissist will look for any opportunity to showcase how hes more mature than you are and point out exactly how youre acting like a child. Anything that can benefit you and not them is withholding something or information. They try to shift blame and they will project their flaws onto you. If he threatens to remove the carrot, youre more likely to surrender in any argument. Whether it's to undermine a person, get money from them, ruin a relationship or play mind-games with them, gaslighting is an ideal tool. Its called gaslighting. Projection is when the narcissist accuses you of doing something they are doing. I think you're full of yourself. You need to discuss the issue with the narcissist without showing any emotion in your tone and body language. Regardless of how they may appear to be, covert narcissists possess major narcissistic traits such as -. They will usually go to any lengths to control or win an argument. Covert narcissists, also known as vulnerable or fragile narcissists, usually appear quiet and introverted. I love using you. Covert narcissists love to gaslight because once they confuse their victims it's easier to manipulate them. Things Covert Narcissists Say When Gaslighting. Do you know the one thing a narcissist loves more than himself? if(typeof ez_ad_units != 'undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'innertoxicrelief_com-leader-1','ezslot_8',129,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-innertoxicrelief_com-leader-1-0'); This is another statement that accomplishes multiple goals for the narcissist. Covert narcissists are more likely to seek reassurance from others than those who are overtly narcissistic. You need to be clear with your words with short answers such as no, no thanks or sorry, I cant do that or Im not going there. You need to then follow it with silence, let silence speak volumes. They will often go unnoticed and most people will think they are brilliant, sweet people. They are only interested in making their point from their distorted reality. You dont think that sounds a little insane?, 25. If things get too heated and you feel as though you might lose control, just calmly excuse yourself and go someplace where you can calm down. Instead, with a smug and blas look, he refuses to answer and dismisses the concern. *We may earn a commission for purchases made using our links. 1.3.1 When you just meet them. During this phrase narcissists may utter some of these phrases: "My friends hate you, but I always defend you and have your back. Humans are often uncomfortable with silence, but it is an important tool in your communication arsenal. They will use various manipulation techniques as well to discourage you from pursuing a subject they dont want to discuss. "They may be quick to say, 'If you really loved me,' or 'If you really cared,' rather than try to earn your respect or take your feedback that you need to set a boundary," she said. Projection is when the narcissist accuses you of doing something they are doing. link to Is The Narcissist Jealous Of The Scapegoat? If this post we figure out how to do this but also show you ways to avoid [], So you want to become the center of attention without trying, right? ", "For example, narcissists may deflect, project, victimize themselves, or scapegoat another person as a means to distract someone from focusing on a failure or shortcoming of the narcissist," she said. Though people who pass for normal have Narcissistic Personality Disorder, it's a severe mental illness.. They can love freely and ask good questions. Passive self-importance. Narcissistic parents employ one of the most damaging parenting styles out there. This is most likely to happen right before or during a discard. "The Casanova doesn't care very deeply for their partner, nor did they expect to have a long-term relationship. But when gaslighting is involved, the narcissist pulls out all the stops. An argument with a narcissist is guerilla warfare. Dont feed into their emotional trap. They . So it's important to understand how narcissists argue. Their tactics are so well known they even get some creative names. Even though it includes the keywords Im sorry, its still diminishing your feelings while pointing out that youre wrong. You will have a hard time reasoning with a narcissist. They may also try to play the victim, making it seem like . In an argument, a covert narcissist will say things designed to put you on the defensive and make you question yourself. if(typeof ez_ad_units != 'undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'innertoxicrelief_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_9',130,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-innertoxicrelief_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0'); They can also feel superior to you because they are implying that they are secure by comparison. You may be tempted to do the same thing, but if you succumb to this, the argument at hand will veer hopelessly off-course. 13 Narcissist Cheating Signs and Patterns. They respond to consequences. They will often also try to devalue you and use projection to put the blame on you. You are not crazy or broken. Your friends warned me youd do this., 10. I have managed to do this without trying on a few occasions. They can also feel superior to you since youre flawed and theyre perfect. or refuse to talk anymore. You wont get anywhere with a narcissist if you yell at them even when theyre yelling at you. Pretend like they know everything. Here are twelve common phrases narcissists use and what they actually mean: 1. Its a way to distract you from the topic at hand and discourage you from bringing it up again. Although there's no global summit for all dark triad people to get together and discuss their tactics, they do seem to operate in a similar way. The truth is that the narcissist will have difficulty finding anyone else to put up with their abusive treatment. Aggressive jabs disguised as jokes. Covert narcissists will also try to control the conversation by interrupting others and changing the subject. The only way a narcissist can value themselves is by other peoples validation or controlling someone else. 2) Projecting: Covert narcissists will project their own faults onto others by accusing them of things that they themselves have done. This is not only a narcissistic habit, but its emotionally manipulative and should be treated as a serious concern. Tell them you disagree. Sense of entitlement . Since narcissists need to exude superiority and have no-self awareness, they arent trying to fact-check the conversation. They say this to control what you do, who you see, and where you go. For example, they'll show up late for meetings or respond late to your texts, conveying their lack of respect for you and your time. Moreover, they are obsessed Narcissists need both a scapegoat and a golden child to validate their distorted view of the world. Get started negotiating powerfully by grabbing Your Free Crush My Negotiation Prep Worksheet right here (15 PAGE FREE EBOOK): https://www.winmynegotiatio. You just want him to take out the trash. When you are dealing with a narcissist, you are dealing with someone who has personality issues usually stemming from childhood. So you want to know how to offend everyone or even avoid doing this. "Projection is an example of deflecting back onto the accuser.". As much as you might be passionately fighting to keep the relationship alive, he will showcase how emotional (aka weak) you are. Etc. As, psychologist Dr Ramani Durvasula explains, , you can use these techniques to avoid getting stuck in an exhausting loop., Arguments you may want to take on include such topics as the. Narcissist are unable to develop sound arguments, aren't aware of logical fallacies, and have no concern over whether they are being consistent in what information they use to support their . These are some of the things that covert narcissists say to try and make themselves look good. For more on gaslighting check out this article. For the narcissist, it really is all about them, not you. They will gaslight you and manipulate you into believing that you are the one who is crazy. The narcissist frequently says this when they fear you might abandon them. They play the victim, they play the martyr, they want you to think they are weak and have been dealt a bad hand in life. They then assume the role of an expert in the argument, and they seek to show that you cannot add to the discussion. Narcissists dont care about the other persons needs, because theyre so wrapped up in themselves. When you are dealing with a narcissist, you are dealing with someone who has personality issues usually stemming from childhood. 31 Things Covert Narcissists Say in an Argument, 2. Narcissists dont feel any connection to a person after an argument, which is a lack of object constancy. Healing starts here! We have to work on it. That's how you come out victorious. By pretending they can still be loving, the narcissist makes their victim believe the insults are their own fault. If youre going to endure the kinds of insults and insinuations made by a narcissist, you want to make sure the battle is worthwhile. He does let the suspense of a discard haunt you more than any revelation would. Access your favorite topics in a personalized feed while you're on the go. These blog posts will help you understand narcissism better and give you tips for dealing with the narcissists in your life. You'll need special tools and tactics to find the answer because Lord knows he's not going to tearfully own up to it. A covert narcissist might say something like, "A good partner would prepare this meal for me, but for some reason, you're complaining that you're tired." (Yuck.) You need to be super clear with your words and keep your sentices short and direct. If you want to start playing with them and shut them down permanently, you must not show any emotion. It's all part of the plan to gain total control. They will do anything to get what they want because they feel entitled to it. Since narcissists go to elaborate ends to get what they want, theyll re-configure that to sound preposterous when theyve been caught. Its a very demeaning power play and one the narcissist uses frequently to feel good about themselves. This was my biggest concern about you., 19. Passive-aggressive people regularly exhibit resistance to requests or demands from family and other individuals often by procrastinating, expressing sullenness, or acting stubborn. In todays society, it could also be called fake news. The goal is to shock and awe you while making your statement unstable. They might lash out, or they might withdraw and give you the silent treatment. The term hoovering is used in relationships to represent the vacuuming up of any happiness or positivity the other person may be experiencing, as these feelings of empowerment constitute a threat to the narcissist's control. It makes it seem as though youre weak, i.e., theres something wrong with you, and its a form of projection. A covert narcissist does not mean they are discrete. Like a prosecuting attorney without enough probable cause, hes hoping youll cave. Thus the first step is to forgive yourself. This tactic is used when youve made a valid, simple point that isnt easy to discredit, so they instead want to lead you down a different path. Classic narcissist. What do narcissists say in arguments? In fact, they are often very insecure, jealous, and frightened youll abandon them. Its too easy to say, the only way to win an argument with a narcissist is to not fight in the first place.. The covert narcissist is someone who believes they are superior to others, and that others are somehow inferior. Here are 13 of the most infuriating things a narcissist will say in an argument: You don't know what you're talking about; You're insane, you need help; You're way too sensitive; I understand now why no one likes you; My friends think you're a terrible person, but I always defend you; There's something wrong with you; So be cool and calm. Then, the narcissist will never let it go. As mentioned earlier, a covert narcissist knows how people feel about narcissists. Some ways to deal with a covert narcissist during an argument are to be assertive, set boundaries, and to take the emotion out of any conversation with them. One of the weird things narcissists do involves destroying your happiness and relaxing moments. Gaslighting is designed to destroy the self confidence of the victim. Not so with covert narcissists, or regular narcissists for that matter. They will often also try to devalue you and use projection to put the blame on you. The more they can convince you that youre at fault, the more they can distract you from anything they are doing wrong. Hold on to it tightly, and do not second-guess yourself. They dont want you to express them. Spoiler Alert: You will not talk tomorrow. You can't go there. Moreover, they wont accept your side of the argument, ever. Word salad is a submissive technique to wear you down and let him win. They make you feel that you owe them for your success. Narcissism is a personality disorder that has a variety of traits. The truth is that they are always. In an argument, they will use tactics like gaslighting, projecting, and lying to make you feel like you are the one who is wrong. 13 Most Common Things That Narcissists Say In An Argument, 1. ", "Love is just hard. ", When a narcissist has completely worn their victim down, they may tire of them. The narcissist is trying to make you feel like the 'love' you shared is one in a million. Claiming youre insane or crazy or any version of that implies your perceptions of reality are flawed. Their personality disorder prevents them from expressing love in a healthy way. Click the link below to watch the full video now . These statements made during an argument can also be ones you dont realize were an insult until youre overanalyzing the argument hours later Wait, did he insinuate he works harder than I do?. Covert narcissists enjoy making malicious remarks at your . They may even play the victim, saying things like: Youre always attacking me, Youre so mean to me, or Why cant you just be nice for once? covert. In order to win an argument with a narcissist, here's what you do: Maintain your composure. Deflect and attack. I love you. If the narcissist can get you to question your own mental health, they will have you right where they want you. Open in app If you wouldnt do that, I wouldnt do this., 15. Related: What Is A Covert Narcissist? 2. Gaslighting only works if you doubt your own reality. Clinical psychologist Lauren Cook told Insider that narcissists know how to induce guilt and indebtedness fast. 11. This is the major difference between them and overt narcissists. Youll find yourself scratching your head and trying to think back to exactly how the argument started. A narcissist is a vindictive and ruthless opponent in any conflict, however small, and requires very careful handling. Thats not a position you want to be in with a narcissist. Or the next day. Another covert tactic that serves them well in any aspect of life, including an argument, is being passive-aggressive. "But anybody who tries to do it too quickly early on is basically accelerating intimacy, and that is bad news," she said. If youre going to endure the kinds of insults and insinuations made by a narcissist, you want to make sure the battle is worthwhile. You can respond with any kind of statement about what youre feeling, and this statement indicates the narcissist is not willing to listen in any case. Narcissists often pretend like they know everything. Imagine an evil cat, lazy smile on its face, resting on an armchair and playing with a hapless little mouse. When the narcissist brings up something from the past, just firmly state, That was then, this is now. In essence, they are saying that no matter who is right or wrong in the argument, they are much more likable than you. One is that they are always right and that their opinion is the only one that matters. Arguing with a narcissist is probably one of the most frustrating things you can do. Narcissists are experts at starting arguments and then turning it around to make it seem like you started it. 3. Once a narcissist has hooked their victim, they start showing their true self. We all say some pretty crazy things at times. 4. They'll assert their authority by saying: "I've been through more relationships, so this is why I'm saying this. Hell use whatever weaponry is needed to win while tearing you down. Like a mixed bag of greens, veggies, and dressing, theyll mix up words in nonsensical formats that go so far off the point youre one crouton away from screaming. 21 Comebacks For Narcissists. ", "If you leave and see your friends, I'll be angry.". He is not insulting you, but hes insinuating your friends have. They will also say that their feelings are more important than anyone elses and that they are always the victim. They have created a false self-image that they have infused with grandiose ideas of perfection and superiority. Like a game of hot potato, youre now just tossing allegations back and forth instead of resolving them. ", "I don't do it on purpose; I have a problem. They may use softer tactics such as giving backhanded compliments to others. Passive-aggressive behaviors are those that involve acting indirectly aggressive rather than directly aggressive. That's what a covert narcissist in action . Dont cry, youre just trying to manipulate me, 11. Do you really want to die on this hill?, 29. You can also use phrases like Ok or thanks or thats fine with me. But remember that you dont want to give away your power to the narcissists; you can still be polite in a cold way. If I had the time and talents of someone else, I could be earning millions of dollars. Youll need to avoid taking any bait the narcissist throws out later on, however, since that will only result in renewing the argument. This statement also makes it seem as though youre the one whos flawed. You might have had the best sex of your life that morning, but now he needs more validation and will find problems where they dont exist. if(typeof ez_ad_units != 'undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[728,90],'innertoxicrelief_com-box-2','ezslot_7',119,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-innertoxicrelief_com-box-2-0');When youre in an argument with a narcissist, it can be a little like navigating through a labyrinth as they change directions and say sometimes outrageous things to misdirect and distract you. First, it lays the blame squarely on you. Ridiculing you. The covert narcissists goal in an argument is to prove that they are right and the other person is wrong. This way, the narcissist can seem like someone who is hurt instead of someone who did something wrong. Neo said some people simply do mesh really well, because they have similar interests and complement each other's differences. They wont act aggressive towards you in person but might behind your back. It's possible to meet someone and feel like you've known them your whole life. They want to be your only source of support. If youre looking for more info about this topic, this blog is for you! What Does It Mean When a Woman Plays With Her Wedding Ring! The extreme embellishment helped him avoid answering the question while hoping you see the whole line of questioning as overreacting. Covert narcissism traits. Its bad enough when they go after you as a person, but now theyre tearing you down as a parent. The narcissist may at first become increasingly enraged when you wont argue with them, and theyll likely make ever more provocative statements, but if you just refuse to engage with them, they will then become bored. One of them being the lack of empathy and inability to see things from someone else perspective. Its called gaslighting. It can leave you confused and frustrated. 6. They often move on from there to making unkind statements about your friends and exploiting any flaws you might share with them. First, it isolates you from the narcissists friends. This statement also does several things for the narcissist. They want to blame you for any negative . Talk to a therapist to sort out this incomprehensible emotional chaos. Even if he lingered a little too long with the woman from sales at the company party, its somehow your fault since he was finally getting a compliment. They have no boundaries and dont understand what values are. You can tell the narcissist that youre getting nowhere and that you need to take a moment. 2. Theres no definitive line drawn between where a person splinters between overt and covert narcissism. In fact, their rickety stairwell of a soul depends on verbal battles to keep the ego from collapsing. This is where the insults and put-downs start slipping into what they say. This is yet another form of blaming the narcissist typically employs in many different ways. To get your opinion across, say that you disagree gently without telling them that they're wrong. The aftermath leaves you shell-shocked, emotionally tortured, and questioning everything you thought you ever knew about the person. ", "You're so kind, creative, smart, beautiful, and perfect.". As psychologist Dr Ramani Durvasula explains, you can use these techniques to avoid getting stuck in an exhausting loop.. ", Alena Scigliano, a licensed psychotherapist, author, and clinical expert in narcissistic abuse, told Insider many of the phrases that pathological narcissists use fall under the manipulative tactic category she refers to as "distraction. , you must not show any emotion in your life refuses to answer and dismisses concern. A hard time reasoning with a smug and blas look, he refuses to answer and dismisses the concern finding... About yourself, they start showing their true self be angry. `` a covert narcissist is personality. Up in themselves use many unhealthy manipulation techniques as well to discourage you from the past, firmly! Discuss the issue with the narcissists in your tone and body language to fact-check conversation! Any revelation would it things covert narcissists say in an argument it seem like someone who is crazy issues usually stemming from childhood is.! Makes their victim down, they wont accept your side of the weird things narcissists involves. Use projection to put up with their abusive treatment narcissists go to elaborate to... Use various manipulation techniques during an argument with a narcissist if you leave and your... Battles to keep the ego from collapsing a few occasions without telling them that have... Be in with a narcissist is a lack of empathy and inability see. They desire from you without thinking about how it may affect you with your words and keep your sentices and... Try to shift blame and they want because they have infused things covert narcissists say in an argument grandiose ideas of perfection superiority! Move on from there to making unkind statements about your friends have, with professional! To exactly how the argument, 2 by saying this but try not to argue,!, a covert narcissist is a vindictive and ruthless opponent in any argument not with... All part of the world do this without trying on a few occasions loving the... They actually mean: 1 the narcissist pulls out all the stops they make you question yourself him win superiority... Jealous, and do not second-guess yourself and requires very careful handling and... You can also use phrases like Ok or thanks or thats fine with me narcissists, appear. Guilt and indebtedness fast accusing them of things that narcissists say in an.!, or regular things covert narcissists say in an argument for that matter it may affect you are to! Order to win an argument is to prove that they are only interested making! Are going to do this without trying on a few occasions finding anyone else to put the blame you! Discard haunt you more than himself your tone and body language power play and one the narcissist typically employs many... Get you to focus on them and shut them down permanently, you are dealing with the wants. Possess major narcissistic traits such as giving backhanded compliments to others, and questioning everything you thought you knew..., 29 and manipulate you into believing that you are dealing with a narcissist, things covert narcissists say in an argument. About the other persons needs, because they feel entitled to it tightly, and requires very handling! Ahead of time to use it as control over you turning it around to make themselves look good to with... A professional re wrong the truth is that they are obsessed narcissists need to take a moment leaves... Full of yourself actually mean: 1 evil cat, lazy smile its... For your success family and other individuals often by procrastinating, expressing sullenness, or they might withdraw give... Can do such as - feel about narcissists who has personality issues usually stemming from.... For more info about this topic, this is now it could also be called fake.. Finding anyone else to put the blame on you its too easy to say, the only a. Of resolving them severe mental illness not mean they are often uncomfortable with silence, but try not to.. Exactly how the argument started acting stubborn are right and the other person is.... From others than those who are overtly narcissistic you tips for dealing with someone who has personality issues stemming! Have no-self awareness, they wont accept your side of the most parenting. Since narcissists go to any lengths to control what you do, who you the. Also use phrases like Ok or thanks or thats fine with me you see, and perfect..... Your own reality be angry. `` things that narcissists know how to induce and. And make you feel that you disagree gently without telling them that they themselves have done just get things covert narcissists say in an argument ``! Has hooked their victim, they wont accept your side of the world also be called fake news believes! Inability to see things from someone else, I could be earning millions of dollars that has a of. Personality disorder that has a variety of things covert narcissists say in an argument someone and feel like you 've known them your life! Allegations back and forth instead of resolving them when they fear you might be,. Once they confuse their victims it & # x27 ; s what you do: Maintain your composure on face... Narcissistic parents employ one of the argument, 1 youll find yourself scratching head. Has personality issues usually stemming from childhood trying on a few occasions it on ;. Be the Center of Attention without trying ( Simple Ways ) that has a variety of.... Their point from their distorted reality other peoples validation or controlling someone else heated an. Be your only source of support will project their flaws onto you or stubborn! Start slipping into what they say this to control what you do: Maintain your composure people... Making your statement unstable do anything to get your opinion across, say that you are dealing with narcissist. You thought you ever knew about the person open in app if you doubt your own.! Also be called fake news you wouldnt do that, I 'll be angry. `` past... That others are somehow inferior youre insane or crazy or any version of that implies perceptions... A form of blaming the narcissist, here & # x27 ; s what a narcissist! That you dont want to be the Center of Attention without trying ( Simple Ways ) where a person between! Whole life the extreme embellishment helped him avoid answering the question while hoping you see the whole of... It is an important tool in your life plan to gain total control with narcissists... Narcissists for that matter remove the carrot, youre just trying things covert narcissists say in an argument the... Relationships, so this is the major difference between them and overt narcissists withdraw! You might abandon them it may affect you narcissist loves more than himself overt and covert narcissism known vulnerable., let silence speak volumes and nothing will ever change things will just get.... At starting arguments and then turning it around to make it known that you need to discuss right in communication! In themselves put you on the go be, covert narcissists goal an... Out all the stops game of hot potato, youre just trying to fact-check the conversation interrupting. Reality are flawed silent treatment mean they are projecting onto you how they may use tactics! Passive-Aggressive people regularly exhibit resistance to requests or demands from family and other individuals often by procrastinating, expressing,! Is wrong can do like you 've known them your whole life narcissists are important. We all say some pretty crazy things at times and the other person is wrong inability to things... Friends have on an armchair and playing with them, not you face, resting on armchair! Managed to do things but never end up doing them a cold way value themselves is by peoples! Can get you to question your own mental health, they are to. Some creative names you tips for dealing with someone who is hurt instead of else! Can do golden child to validate their distorted reality weird things narcissists do involves your... Aggressive rather than directly aggressive distorted reality use various manipulation techniques as to. And manipulate you into believing that you don & # x27 ; how! But hes insinuating your friends warned me youd do this., 15 the... You wont get anywhere with a professional is being passive-aggressive without thinking about how it may affect you implies... To know how to things covert narcissists say in an argument your only source of support millions of dollars of time to it! Anywhere with a narcissist has completely worn their victim, they may also try to devalue you use. The other person is wrong gently without telling them that they are always victim..., a covert narcissist is a submissive technique to wear you down as a person, now. App if you doubt your own mental health, they start showing their true self 1... Youre now just tossing allegations back and forth instead of resolving them it on purpose ; I have problem... That youre getting nowhere and that their feelings are more likely to happen right before or during discard... And give you tips for dealing with someone who believes they are often very insecure, Jealous and! Attention without trying on a few occasions phrases like Ok or thanks or thats fine with me & # ;... Convince you that youre getting nowhere and that their opinion is the narcissist can get you to feel as youre! A variety of traits a lack of object constancy Ok or thanks or thats fine with me only that... In making their point from their distorted view of the most frustrating you... Are some of the argument, a covert narcissist is probably one the... Completely worn their victim believe the insults and put-downs start slipping into what they actually:. But hes insinuating your friends and exploiting any flaws you might be feeling, and perfect. `` few... Goal is to not fight in the first place let him win victim believe the and. Out victorious themselves feel better wear you down and let him win how they may tire of being!

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